Friday, January 20, 2012

Sea Bass ? or Chivas?

Passenger : Excuse me
Kumbang : Yes?
Passenger : Can I have one more sea bass please?
Kumbang : Sea bass? you mean the main course? the fish?
Passenger : Yes, sea bass
Kumbang : I'm sorry we dont serve fish today
Passenger : Yes, but can I have sea bass please
Kumbang : *mulai kesel* yes but we dont have fish today, Sir. We do have beef and chicken, which one would you like?
Passenger : I'd like some sea bass, with ice.
Kumbang : Sea bass with ice???????
Passenger : Yes, sea bass, the whisky
Kumbang : Ahhhh, you mean CHIVAS?!?!
Passenger : Yes! that one
Kumbang : -____-"

balik lagi ke TK yuk! belajar nama2 binatang....

suatu malam di restoran Indonesia di Cairns, Australia....

Melati : ehh liat tuh, tikus lompatnya kayak kangguru
Kumbang : itu kan kodok.........
Melati : ah masa??
Kumbang : tikus mana bisa lompat

suatu siang yang cerah di pantai, somewhere in Green Island....

Melati : ihhh elangnya lucu dehhh
Kumbang : itu kan camar......
Melati : masa sih ??
Kumbang : elang warnanya gak putih semua gitu.....

suatu sore dalam perjalanan menuju ke hotel...

Melati : *nunjuk ke laut* cantik yaaa angsa nya...
Kumbang : itu kan bangau.......
Melati : masa iya?? emg apa bedanya bangau sama angsa??
Kumbang : bangau kakinya lebih panjang daripada angsa...

*ternyata, bisa jetlag juga di Australia

Friday, October 14, 2011

updates

We haven't update much lately.

Its because we're busy flying... traveling... and hanging around... like we always did on our days off...

We still have some weird passengers. Yup, a lot of them

We still have funny things to tell

We still have silly behaviors

And yes, some more stories coming :)

Mosquito Repellent to eat

Pada suatu hari, Melati dan Kumbang sedang makan malam di restoran dekat rumah mereka. 

Kumbang : Excuse me, can I have a Tabasco please?
Waiter 1 : Ok.

......menunggu 10 menit.......

Kumbang : Excuse me, can I have Tabasco please?
Waiter 2 : What??
Kumbang : Tabasco..
Waiter 2 : *gak ngerti* mmm.. what??
Kumbang : Tabasco??
Waiter 2 : mmmm... *geleng2 kepala* Ok

......menunggu 10 menit.......

Kumbang : Excuse me, do you have Tabasco?
Waiter 3 : yes....
Kumbang : So... Can I have it?
Waiter 3 : *sigap* sure!!!

......5 detik kemudian.......

Waiter 3 : there you go... *ngasih MOSQUITO REPELLENT trus ngacir*
Kumbang : *bengong* ......gue td ngomongnya Tabasco kan yah??
Melati : udah..udah.. sini gue ambil sendiri

minta TABASCO kok dikasihnya MOSQUITO REPELLENT....???? disuruh bunuh diri apa ya.......

Friday, February 25, 2011

Nick Hornby vs Nicholas Sparks

Melati : Lo ada film The Last Song ga?
Kumbang : Hmm.. ga tau deh kyknya udah gue apus..
Melati : Yaahhh... sama film yg satu lg tuh.. hmmm apa tuh judulnya.. yg dari bukunya Nick Hornby juga
Kumbang : Nick Hornby ?
Melati : *sok tau* iyaaaa.. itu lho yg nulis buku nya The Last Song..
Kumbang : Yg nulis bukunya The Last Song itu Nicholas Spark.......
Melati : *malu* Eh iya maksud gue itu.. yaa sama2 Nick kan depannya
Kumbang : *ngikik* gue ga kenal Nick Hornby siapa..
Melati : lho, dia penulis juga bukan?
Kumbang : Emang iya ?
Melati : *langsung googling* bener kan Nick Hornby penulis juga (dalem hati : untung Nick Hornby penulis juga, kalo enggak kan malu banget gue!)

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

I'm eating bear

once upon a time, one set of crew having lunch in outport, then they're having a conversations about food.

Male Crew : Yeah, in my country they will even eat beer.
Captain : *bingung* beer?
Male Crew : Yes, we eat beer's hands.
Captain : *bengong*
Female Crew : *bingung, beer kok di 'makan'* what is beer?
Male Crew : *diam sejenak* ehhh sorry2.. I mean, they used to eat BEAR's hand
The whole set of crew : WHAT?!?!?!
Male Crew : *santai* yeah, and the bear still alive, they will just cut the hands like that
Crew : ...............................


its better if you tell people that you eat beer than you eat bear, right?

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

rice ? wise ? wice ? WINE !!

masih cerita seputar wine

Melati : would you like to have chicken rice or beef potato
Passenger : rice *sambil nyengir*
Melati : chicken rice?
Passenger 1 : yes..yes..
Melati : certainly, may I offer you some drinks?
Passenger 1 : mmmm.. *ngeliatin cart nya si Melati* RICE!! *sambil tersenyum lebar*
Melati : *bingung* excuse me? rice?
Passenger 1 : *masih nyengir* rice..rice..
Melati : *nunjuk makanan si passenger di meja* yes this is rice, chicken with rice, now can I offer you drinks?
Passenger 1 : wice..wise..*sambil ngangguk2*
Melati : *bengong sambil ngeliatin gerakan bibir si passenger* mmmm.. juice?? *nebak2 ngasal*
Passenger 2 (di sebelah nya) : *ikutan bengong dan berusaha nebak2 minuman apa yg di minta*
Passenger 1 : noooo..wicee..wise...
Melati : *tambah bingung* mmm...
Passenger 2 : *nanya ke passenger 1* you mean WINE ?
Passenger 1 : *senyum sumringah lebar* yeeeeessssss.. wiseeeeeee.. *tetep salah nyebut*
Melati : Ahhhhhh I see.. You want red wine or white one?
Passenger 1 : wet wise...
Melati : *langsung nangkep* Red wine? here's your red wine sir...
             Thanks for telling me, Sir *ngomong ke Passenger 2*
Passenger 2 : your welcome *nunduk sambil senyum2 ngeliat muka Melati yang daritadi udah frustasi berat*

Astaga...nebak wine aja kok susah banget...

celana robek

Suatu hari, di tengah2 service, di tengah2 cabin, seorang cabin crew laki-laki memanggil partner nya.

Male Crew : Emmm.. excuse me, would you mind to replace me for a while
Female Crew : Ha?? Why??
Male Crew : Emmm.. *ngomong bisik2* Because my trousers was torn.....
Female Crew : *teriak suara kenceng* What?? Your trousers was torn?? Are you kidding me ?? Where?? 
Male Crew : Ssshh.. here.. *sambil nunjukkin celana nya yang robek*
Female Crew : *ketawa ngakak kenceng2* hahahahahahahahahhha, ok ok I will replace you, go and change with the new one
Male Crew : *dengan muka yang udah se-merah tomat, pamit undur diri dari cabin dan sejumlah penumpang yang sebagian ikutan ketawa dan sebagian lagi berwajah prihatin*

Monday, November 15, 2010

beef-nya pake babi nggak Mbak ?

Lagi2, keanehan selalu banyak terjadi di Surabaya flight. Kali ini Mawar adalah korbannya..

Mawar : Pak, hari ini menunya beef rice sama prawn noodle, bapak mau yang mana??
Passenger : Beef mbak??
Mawar : Iya
Passenger : Beef nya pake babi nggak Mbak?
Mawar : *bingung* Hah? Bagaimana Pak?
Passenger : Iya, beefnya tapi nggak pake pork kan Mbak?? Ga ada babi nya??
Mawar : Emmm.. yaaa.. ini beef, Pak.. Daging sapi..Halal kok..
Passenger : Ohh iya.. iya... boleh deh Mbak, makasih ya

Mawar : Iya Pak, sama2..*sambil ngasih makanan ngomong dalem hati : yang namanya beef ya beef pak.. beda sama babi...*

Friday, November 12, 2010

Manis......kayak saya

Suatu hari, di Surabaya flight....

Crew : Mbak, mau minum apa?
Mbak 1 : Apple juice aja deh, Mas...
Crew : Ini apple juice nya Mbak..
Mbak 1 : Makasih Mas..*cepet2 diminum*
Crew : Iya sama2 Mbak
Mbak 1 : Waduh manis banget Mas apple juice nya
Mbak 2 : *nyeletuk* Wah apple juice cocok tuh buat saya, kan manis seperti saya...
Crew : *bengong* dalem hati : manis darimana.. Mbak sih cocoknya air putih, tawar gitu..

Can I have a wife ?

Pax : Excuse me, can I have a wife ?
Crew : *bingung* a wife ?
Pax : Yes, a wife!
Crew : I dont think I can give you that
Pax : Wife!! Wife!! *melakukan gerakkan seperti orang minum*
Crew : *membuka refrigerator* You mean this one? Wine?
Pax : *malu* Yessss, WIIINEE!!

Pak, kalo mau ganti celana, jangan di galley yah !

Suatu hari di sebuah penerbangan, seorang bapak-bapak berumur kira2 40 tahunan datang ke galley.

Pax : cang cing cong cang cing cong
Male Crew : I'm sorry, I dont speak Chinese
Pax : *tetep ngoceh* cang cing cong cang cing cong
Male Crew : ?????
Pax : *tiba2 buka celana, bersiap2 mau ganti*
Male Crew : *langsung kabur keluar galley & tutup tirai nya*

Female Crew : *jalan dari aisle sebelah, siap2 mau masuk galley*
Male Crew : Ummmm.. I don't recommend you to go in there
Female Crew : Why?
Male Crew : You can try and see yourself
Female Crew : *bingung dan tetep masuk ke galley*

Sedetik kemudian......

Female Crew : Ohh sh*ttt
Male Crew : Hahahaha, I told you

Garbage

Pax : *press the call light*
Crew : Yes, how may I help you?
Pax : garbage...garbage... *sambil melakukan gerakan memakai selimut*
Crew : You want garbage?
Pax : yes...yes...
Crew : I'll come back to you
Pax : *mengangguk2*
Crew : *sambil membawakan selimut dan berbisik pelan* this is BLAAANKET, not garbage
Pax : *cengengesan, entah tanda mengerti, entah tanda tidak mengerti*
Crew : -____-

Obama bin Laden

Suatu hari, sehabis flight New York dan Los Angeles yang sangat melelahkan, dua teman se-apartment berbincang-bincang.

Kumbang : Lo tadi kemana aja?
Melati      : Nggak kemana2, di rumah aja
Kumbang : Oh ya? Ngapain aja seharian?
Melati      : Masak.. makan..ngerapiin cucian..nonton...
Kumbang : Nonton apaan?
Melati      : Itu lho, pidatonya Obama di Jakarta...
Kumbang : Oooohhh
Melati      : Iya, Obama... *diem sejenak* Obama bin Laden...
Kumbang : *bengong sejenak, merasa ada yang aneh dengan perkataan Melati, lalu tertawa terbahak2*
Melati      : *bingung* Eh.. salah ya, itu mah Osama :P *muka memerah*

Sekali lagi, beginilah akibatnya kalau terlalu banyak mengerjakan US flight...

Monday, October 11, 2010

pengaruh tekanan

Melati : Wahhhh.. berani juga yaa lo ikut bungy jumping
Daun : Iyaa dooongg *bangga*
Melati : Trus lo turunnya gimana tuh? Lo lepasin tali nya sendiri ya?
Daun : *menjawab dengan lantang* Enggak!!
Melati : Oooh ada perahu di bawah yg nangkep lo?
Daun : *kembali menjawab dengan lantang* Enggak!!
Melati : *bingung* Lho, trus gimana????
Daun : Gue lepasin tali nya sendiri...
Melati : *geplak pala nya si Daun* Lahhhh.. tadi gue bilang apa...
Daun : Eh??

Temennya Melati : *nyeletuk* makanya.... jangan kebanyakkan terbang deh lo berdua...

3 kali ????

Pada suatu hari, alkisah ada seorang turis datang jauh2 dari Cambodia mengunjungi Hong Kong, dan tanpa sengaja mendengar percakapan 2 orang Cabin Crew

Cabin Crew X : Eh lo tau gak, gue kemaren ngeliat orang lompat dari lantai paling atas
Cabin Crew Y : Hah?? Masa?? Aduh serem amat ya..
Cabin Crew X : Iya.. ini udah kasus yang ketiga lho... Total udah 3 orang yang lompat dari lantai atas..
Cabin Crew Y : HAH??? Tuh orang udah tiga kali lompat??!?!?
Cabin Crew X : *emosi* Yeee.. bukan 3 kali lompat.. tapi ini udah orang ketiga yg lompat.. -__-"
Cabin Crew Y : Ooooo... *manggut2*

Turis : *diem2 ketawa cekikikan sambil mikir : Oh, ternyata Cabin Crew kelakuannya begini toh. ck ck ck*

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

something with "S"

Kumbang : Eh, hotel di Singapore yang biasa kita nginep namanya apa ya??
Mawar : Mmmm.. Starworld??
Melati : Bukaaaaaaaannn.. itu mah channel tv..
Mawar : Sofitel...???
Melati : Bukaaaaaaaaan itu juga.. hmmmmhh.. pokoknya something with "S" deh...
Mawar : Apaan ya?? Lupa gue..
Melati : *berteriak lancang dengan PD nya* FURAMA !!!
Mawar : *ngedumel diem2* Tadi katanya something with "S"... kok skrg Furama
Kumbang : *ngikik diem2*

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Knight Rider ??????

Melati : Eh, waktu itu kan gue nonton film Knight Rider ya sama si Mawar
Lebah : Knight Rider? Emang ada yang baru
Melati : Ada tauuuu.. itu loh yang maen si Cameron Diaz sama Tom Cruise itu..
Kumbang : Knight and Day kali??
Melati : *malu* ehh.. iya, maksud gue itu...
Lebah : *ngakak* BWAHAHAHAHA.. duh, yang jetlag siapa sih nih..perasaan gue deh yg baru pulang terbang..
Kumbang : *ketawa tak bersuara*

Friday, September 17, 2010

jaga baby ya??

Suatu hari, Melati sedang liburan dan pulang ke Jakarta sebagai passenger. Sialnya, flight hari itu sangat sangat sangat sangat penuh sekali. Dan sialnya lagi, Melati duduk di tengah2. Di tengah2 diantara ibu2 tua sok asyik dan kakek2 rempong.

Ibu2 tua : Kamu abis liburan ya di Hong Kong?
Melati : *senyum* Oh enggak, Bu.. saya kerja disini..
Ibu2 tua : *dengan polosnya* Ooh kerja??? Kerja apa kamu?? Jaga baby ya?
Melati : *keki setengah mati* Enggak bu, saya pramugari. *dalem hati : do I look like babysitter?????*
Ibu2 tua : *mengangguk2* Oooo gitu ya.. wahh asik yaa..trus2, gajinya pasti gede dong ya?? *nanya2 annoying, pengen tau mode on*
Melati : *jutek* Maaf bu, saya nonton film dulu ya *sambil tutup kuping pake headset*

lesson : lain kali, kalo catch flight as a passenger, jangan lupa dandan ya.. biar ga disangka kerja di Hong Kong jaga baby...

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Paper Juice

Once upon a time, during the meal & drink service

Melati : What would you like to drink, Sir?
Passenger : Paper juice?
Melati : *bingung* Paper juice? What's that?
Passenger : Paper juice *with his confident smile*
Melati : Errr.. We have Orange Juice, Apple Juice and Tomato Juice, which one Sir?
Passenger : Paper juice *and give the look -you're a cabin crew, you should've know what is paper juice-*
Melati : What is that?? *give the look -do you think I know what is paper juice????-*
Passenger : *talk to his friend in Chinese*
His Friend : *geleng2 kepala*
Melati : *dalem hati : temen lo aja ga tau, apalagi gue.. -__-"* Yes, sir?
Passenger : This one *nunjuk2 Coke*
Melati : You mean Coke sir?????
Passenger : Yes..
Melati : *sambil nuang Coke : dari tadi kekk.. pake tebak2an dulu paper juice apaan -__-"*